William H.A. Willbond MSM, CD

AN ODE TO THE SAANICHTON INTELLECTUALS

I’m the fat old retired guy who sweeps up your glass
From the empty beer bottles on the roadway you smash
I know about hormones – I was once seventeen
When I went to the Army, serving Country and Queen

My Sergeant he said, you want something to gash
Take this bayonet and give all those sandbags a slash
And I worry about tires on your mom and dad’s car
Driving children to school they won’t get too far?

When you siphon gas, it gets in your lungs
Causing lesions and sores, before cancer comes
You think you are getting free gas to-day?
Down the road you may have to suffer and pay!

You, smashed the well cover, at the stone house
And tore down the sign owned by Norma and spouse
You stole the chrome tie-down off my truck side
Do you have no religion, no honour, no pride?

You tore up the family name at the Nimmo home
Your destruction has forced me to write down this poem
You stole the sign ICROSS from off my truck door
To buy a replacement takes food from the poor!

I want you to know, that if I see you smash glass
You will learn that an old guy can still kick your ass
Unarmed combat free lessons will be donated to you
As you learn what a fat old commando can do

To young intellectuals, who roam through the night
Go join the US Army, you’ll learn how to fight
You smashed the bus shelter, you smashed plexiglass
We taxpayers paid for your actions, low class

I was just kidding, I wouldn’t assault you
You’re weak and you’re foolish and you ain’t got a clue
So I urge all my neighbours to join in the fun
When you see these destructions, please call 9-1-1