Ann-Marie Spittle

THAT DISTANT HOPE

Death calls my name
I ignore it
It has visited before
Talks of endless night
That costs too much
For ending all will end all
Though I will live on
As spirit in another place
While those left behind suffer for my actions
I’ve lived and died, laughed and cried
Wondered if peace would come from annihilation
Wandered paths of dark cloying madness
Walking walls, and talking animals
Until I arrived at now
That definitive moment
That knowing time
That distant hope
Lighting my path to consequences
That should not be fulfilled
Knowledge that next generation
Will be marred forever
Unable to function
Due to my weakness
Was this how Christ felt
When faced with such terrors
Run or stay
Walk away and live as all people do
Or take the lesser path and change the world
He holds my hand and whispers,
“I am with you. Take the step.”
The little victories echo the most
Though the halls of history
Changing the ripples to circles
Rather than jagged waves that crash and destroy
Taking a breath saves a life
That aggressive action would have destroyed